LONG TERM RELATIONSHIPS ENDING IN BREAK-UPS

In a traditional, old-fashioned city like Bacolod, everybody knows about everybody. The six-degrees? Almost non-existent.



John went to school with Mark, Mark and Victoria grew up in the same village, Victoria is Emma’s cousin. You see where I’m getting?



I have friends who have been with the same people since high school. Since high school! How weird is that? Okay, so I’m not all for romance and stuff, but since high school and still not hitched? Talk about a really loooong, and I bet, tiring, engagement.



If a ten-year relationship is not enough for you to get to know each other, don’t you think you might have probably learned that you’re not for each other? The longest relationship I’ve been in was about 4 years and it did not even take long for him to become parasitic. I’ve since chalked that off as ridiculous mistake of my youth. I was in college.



I believe that couples who stay together for that many years are either holding on because they are afraid to let go or holding on because they’re too tired to start over. It’s like finding a job. If you’re already okay in your current occupation and there seem to be no problem, why would you want to find another job and start over? The resumes you have to write, classifieds you have to scan, interviews you have to go through, etc. etc. It’s just like a relationship. If you’re already satisfied with what you have and everything seems to function, why would you want to go through the chase again? Sifting through jerks to find ‘the one’ is not exactly pleasant. Faking it is almost, always not worth it.



But staying in a relationship that has gotten routine-like, I feel, is also unpleasant. Necrophiliac even. Again, faking it is not worth all the effort. I’d rather read a magazine and learn something than wait for the mosquitoes to lay their eggs in the stagnant relationship.



If you’re not gonna get married after being together for 10 years, you are gonna have to decide. If you still think there’s love between you, live together! That’s enough challenge to make things exciting for you. But if you’re already living together and in a relationship and have been doing the same thing day-in-day-out, stop torturing yourself! Skip out before it’s too late. Horace says it’s later than you think. And if you’re genuinely happy, congratulations and best wishes.



May 4, 2009

Good Girls who Keep Diaries

“It’s the good girls who keep the diaries – the bad girls never have the time.” -- Talullah Bankhead

Is that accurate? How true is that? I love that Talullah Bankhead (I really don’t know who she is but her name is a Tori Amos song and I used to want that name for my daughter.) is so right on the money.

When I was in 3rd grade, I started diary-writing. I think it was because my classmates were always teasing me about being a tomboy. I admit I was boyish during my younger years and I used to love beating up little boys. A boyish bully. Yup, that about sums it up.

I moved to a straight Catholic school run by nuns eventually because I think I’ve beaten up everyone I knew. But I kept diary-ing because in 4th grade, I started being a little girlie. Mainly because I discovered I was crushing on this guy from 6th grade, really cute, and that he, too, was crushing on me. He even gave me flowers. Awwww. Puppy, er, crush? Again, I’m not big on love and romance.

And in 4th grade, I became Miss Intrams and it was a big thing for me because I was a new student. And out of nowhere, I got voted Miss Intramurals. Besting the five other girls from 1st grade to 6th grade. Oh and Miss 6th Grade, she was escorted by my Mr. 6th grade. They gave him a hard time for giving flowers to someone outside their classroom and were giving me dirty, catty looks the whole time. But I won. So my winning really meant ‘up yours’ to them. But my being pop did not last forever. I went back to being boyish and beat up another classmate who decided to cross our game of Chinese garter. So I had to set him straight.

Onto another school. This time Protestant and Chinese. (Not because I was obsessed with my broken Chinese garter.) I had my first boyfriend in high school. And he was a two-timer. So the diary-ing went on. Until I got to college and school number 4 for me. I got a new set of friends. And a whole sea of faces – ugly and pretty. And I started dating again. Ideally, I should have continued writing in my diary. But then, like Talullah said, I got busy. I no longer had the time.

So after writing hardbound volumes and volumes of hard core teen angst and creating my own code for secrets I didn’t want other people to know about just in case I misplace my diaries, I, unintentionally, stopped writing.

May 4, 2009

Facing The Music

After, I'm guessing, 7 years, I went and got my face done. And with that I just mean I had a facial.

Yup, took me over 7 years. I have no excuse. Just poor facial hygiene on my part. But in fairness to my poorly-treated face, my preggers facialist showed me a very unsuccessful 'harvest'. She said I did not have much to 'sow' because my pores weren't that open. Yay! That perked me up a bit.

When I was still TV-visible, I religiously had my facials done at Indulgence. (I think they've already closed down.) But since I became a private citizen, I would treat myself to a no-prick-just-cleansing facial at a variety of spas. Oatmeal, cucumber, milk, coffee, and chocolate were the types of masks I've tried.

Because of my fondness for physical pain, I looked forward to facials with pricking. My eyes would involuntarily well up when they prick around my nose, lips & eyes. But then my ortho taught me a neat trick -- take painkillers before going in. I take only 250mgs so that I could stil feel some and my eyes still welled up a little but all the discomfort -- poof!

Now that there's Let's Face It in Bacolod, I'd probably be getting facials regularly now. LFI's set-up is the same as the ones they have in Manila. You all lay side by side. Too close for me but I like their service though -- with derma check-ups on the side.

There's another one that I also would like to try soon. Skin Spa is located near my daughter's school so I might pop in there too and get myself popped. Would keep you posted how it goes.